It Calls Me,
Day And Night,
It Calls Me,
A Voice At The Back Of My Head,
A Nagging Thumping Voice At The Back Of My Head,
I Look Away,
I Try And Hide My Face,
Hoping It Will Go Away..
Hoping It Will See,
I’m Trying To Be Strong,
But It Eats Away At Me..
The Afternoon
Tap, Tap, Tap..
The Voice Is Back,
Calling,
Pursuing,
Wearing Me Down,
Breaking Down The Defences
That Were Standing So Well..
My Barriers Now Falling,
My Army Defeated,
My Guard Now Down,
My Will Power Depleted..
The Evening Has Come,
And I’ve Done So Well,
Resisting The Temptation,
The Seductive Lure..
But As Well As I’ve Done,
The Evening Wins,
Another Tick To Add To My Sins...
Sunday, 26 June 2011
(Friends) And Family
Fuck Off Then Leave Me,
Times Are To Hard,
Forget About The Present,
The Future And The Past,
Forget About Old Times,
And The Things We’ve Been Through,
And How My Life Used To Revolve Around You..
My Family Are Leaving,
Yeah There Going Too,
All shacking up Together,
To Live Happily By The Sea,
All Fucking Off They Can’t Wait To Leave Me..
Friends And Family All Leaving My Side,
Since I’ve Turned Into A Demented,
Physcotic,
Freak,
They All Run And Hide..
Well Fuck Off The Lot Of You,
Go And Leave Me,
You Were All Happy To Stay When I Was Young And Care Free,
But Now I Have Changed,
Things Are Harder For Me,
Why Don’t You Care,
Why Can’t You See...
I’ll Fight My Battle,
And Fight It Alone,
And When It Beats Me,
And I’m On My Last Breath,
Facing Near And Certain Death,
Remember How You Left Me,
That You Didn’t Care,
That You Wern’t Around For Me,
You Were Never There..
Times Are To Hard,
Forget About The Present,
The Future And The Past,
Forget About Old Times,
And The Things We’ve Been Through,
And How My Life Used To Revolve Around You..
My Family Are Leaving,
Yeah There Going Too,
All shacking up Together,
To Live Happily By The Sea,
All Fucking Off They Can’t Wait To Leave Me..
Friends And Family All Leaving My Side,
Since I’ve Turned Into A Demented,
Physcotic,
Freak,
They All Run And Hide..
Well Fuck Off The Lot Of You,
Go And Leave Me,
You Were All Happy To Stay When I Was Young And Care Free,
But Now I Have Changed,
Things Are Harder For Me,
Why Don’t You Care,
Why Can’t You See...
I’ll Fight My Battle,
And Fight It Alone,
And When It Beats Me,
And I’m On My Last Breath,
Facing Near And Certain Death,
Remember How You Left Me,
That You Didn’t Care,
That You Wern’t Around For Me,
You Were Never There..
All Over
Looking Up From My Casket,
Velvet Interior Cusions My Limbs,
Peace And Tranquility,
Calmness Falling Over Me..
No More Worry,
Heartache,
Anguish,
Pain Or Sadness..
My Chamber Protects Me,
I’m Now At Rest,
I’ve Escaped From This Place,
And The Evil,
Repulsive,
Destructive,
Human Race..
I’m Feeling I’ve Won,
I’ve Beaten This Disease,
Crippled Me For So Long,
I Now Feel At Ease..
It Fucked Up My Mind,
And Played With My Head,
Everyday Telling Myself,
“I Wish I Were Dead”..
At Peace At Last,
Quiet And Still,
With A Smile On My Face,
Laying Here Dressed To Kill...
Velvet Interior Cusions My Limbs,
Peace And Tranquility,
Calmness Falling Over Me..
No More Worry,
Heartache,
Anguish,
Pain Or Sadness..
My Chamber Protects Me,
I’m Now At Rest,
I’ve Escaped From This Place,
And The Evil,
Repulsive,
Destructive,
Human Race..
I’m Feeling I’ve Won,
I’ve Beaten This Disease,
Crippled Me For So Long,
I Now Feel At Ease..
It Fucked Up My Mind,
And Played With My Head,
Everyday Telling Myself,
“I Wish I Were Dead”..
At Peace At Last,
Quiet And Still,
With A Smile On My Face,
Laying Here Dressed To Kill...
My Final Journey
My Final Journey,
A Drawn Out Procession,
People Snivelling,
Portraying An Ugly Pretense,
Why Not Stand Tall,
Why Not Be True,
Most Of These People,
I Don’t Even Know You..
Acting Upset
I’m Wondering Why,
As Crocodile Tears Fall From Your Eye,
Pathetic,
Worthless,
Show Of Affection,
Just You Wait,
Till My Resurrection,
I’ll Rise Again,
And Be Different You’ll See,
I Won’t Need Anybody,
To Love And Hold Me,
I Won’t Get Close,
So You Can Walk Away,
Be Up All Night,
To Prey That You Stay,
I’ll Be On My Own,
Right From The Start,
Right To The End,
Till Death Do Us Part..
A Drawn Out Procession,
People Snivelling,
Portraying An Ugly Pretense,
Why Not Stand Tall,
Why Not Be True,
Most Of These People,
I Don’t Even Know You..
Acting Upset
I’m Wondering Why,
As Crocodile Tears Fall From Your Eye,
Pathetic,
Worthless,
Show Of Affection,
Just You Wait,
Till My Resurrection,
I’ll Rise Again,
And Be Different You’ll See,
I Won’t Need Anybody,
To Love And Hold Me,
I Won’t Get Close,
So You Can Walk Away,
Be Up All Night,
To Prey That You Stay,
I’ll Be On My Own,
Right From The Start,
Right To The End,
Till Death Do Us Part..
Tomorrow
I Miss The Old Days,
Pop A Pill,
The Pain Goes Away,
Now I Grieve,
I Live Through It,
But Everyday I grieve..
Tomorrow,
Her Special Day,
A Tear Will Fall..
Will I Call?
No,
I’ll Try But It Will Be Too Hard,
I’m Not Strong Enough,
It Eats Me,
It Burns Away,
Torturing Me,
Tormenting Me..
If Ever Someone Asked Me,
How It Feels,
To Have Your Heart Pierced,
Ripped In Two,
Bury A Dagger Straight Through,
Deprive It Of Life,
Starve It,
Suffocate,
Annihilate,
Then I can say,
I Know..
The Tumour Inside,
Growing,
Feeding Off My Ordeal,
Crushing My Every Organ,
I’ll Wear My Mask To Work,
Smile And Laugh,
Be So Fucking Helpful,
Until I Return Home,
Where I’ll Crumble,
And Break..
Burn Me At
The Stake,
Free Me From This Sorrow,
For Tomorrow,
Inside I’ll Die.
Pop A Pill,
The Pain Goes Away,
Now I Grieve,
I Live Through It,
But Everyday I grieve..
Tomorrow,
Her Special Day,
A Tear Will Fall..
Will I Call?
No,
I’ll Try But It Will Be Too Hard,
I’m Not Strong Enough,
It Eats Me,
It Burns Away,
Torturing Me,
Tormenting Me..
If Ever Someone Asked Me,
How It Feels,
To Have Your Heart Pierced,
Ripped In Two,
Bury A Dagger Straight Through,
Deprive It Of Life,
Starve It,
Suffocate,
Annihilate,
Then I can say,
I Know..
The Tumour Inside,
Growing,
Feeding Off My Ordeal,
Crushing My Every Organ,
I’ll Wear My Mask To Work,
Smile And Laugh,
Be So Fucking Helpful,
Until I Return Home,
Where I’ll Crumble,
And Break..
Burn Me At
The Stake,
Free Me From This Sorrow,
For Tomorrow,
Inside I’ll Die.
Existing
My Morning Comes,
The Sun Failing To Break Through,
Lethargy Building Up Over Me,
Wanting To Hide Away,
Sleep Through The Day..
Get Up For What?
Leave Me Alone,
If I Don’t Move
Then No One Will Know..
I’m Hiding Away,
I Just Can’t Move,
My Arms And Legs
Feeling Like Lead Balloons,
So Fuckin Heavy,
This Day Sucks I Hate It,
I Hate You For Not Seeing It,
My Disease Ridden Body,
Lay Festering In My Pit..
When’s My Day Over?
How Much More To Endure?
Why Can’t It End Now?
Whys There No Cure?
I Hate It Here,
Instead Of Being
Incarcerated,
Entombed,
Trapped,
In This Lifeless Shell,
Why Can’t I Move
Get Out Of This Hell..
A Transfer,
A Swap,
An Exchange,
A Body,
A Mind,
For A Change,
But Knowing My Luck,
I Guess That I’m Stuck,
With This Worthless
Constitution I’m In...
The Sun Failing To Break Through,
Lethargy Building Up Over Me,
Wanting To Hide Away,
Sleep Through The Day..
Get Up For What?
Leave Me Alone,
If I Don’t Move
Then No One Will Know..
I’m Hiding Away,
I Just Can’t Move,
My Arms And Legs
Feeling Like Lead Balloons,
So Fuckin Heavy,
This Day Sucks I Hate It,
I Hate You For Not Seeing It,
My Disease Ridden Body,
Lay Festering In My Pit..
When’s My Day Over?
How Much More To Endure?
Why Can’t It End Now?
Whys There No Cure?
I Hate It Here,
Instead Of Being
Incarcerated,
Entombed,
Trapped,
In This Lifeless Shell,
Why Can’t I Move
Get Out Of This Hell..
A Transfer,
A Swap,
An Exchange,
A Body,
A Mind,
For A Change,
But Knowing My Luck,
I Guess That I’m Stuck,
With This Worthless
Constitution I’m In...
Torn
Ripped Me Apart,
Without You Knowing It,
Ripped Me Apart,
Without Me Showing It..
My Body Shows No Signs Of Wear,
My Mind In Shreds,
My Heart Bears The Tear..
Torn At The Seams,
Wasted,
Desolated..
My Feelings Treated With Contempt,
Used,
Borrowed,
Abused,
Then Destroyed..
A Queue Now Forming,
Friends,
Family,
Swarming,
I Lay Crushed,
Battered,
My Heart Decayed,
My Friendship Betrayed..
Without You Knowing It,
Ripped Me Apart,
Without Me Showing It..
My Body Shows No Signs Of Wear,
My Mind In Shreds,
My Heart Bears The Tear..
Torn At The Seams,
Wasted,
Desolated..
My Feelings Treated With Contempt,
Used,
Borrowed,
Abused,
Then Destroyed..
A Queue Now Forming,
Friends,
Family,
Swarming,
I Lay Crushed,
Battered,
My Heart Decayed,
My Friendship Betrayed..
Why Have You Left Me
So Fucking Easy To Run Away,
After All We Went Through,
I Was There Every Day,
Looking After You,
I Never Ran,
Come Rain Or Shine,
I Hid My Tears,
Pretend All Was Fine,
But It Wasn’t,
It Eat Away At Me,
Tore Me Inside,
There Was No Where For Me,
To Run Or To Hide,
I Stood My Ground,
No Matter How Hard Things Got,
It Would Have Been Less Painful,
If I Had Been Shot,
In The Head,
Blowing Out My Brains,
Rip off my limbs,
Cut up my body and Tie
It in chains..
But I Did It,
And I Did It For You,
I Can Hold My Head High,
No Matter How Hard,
I Saw It All Through,
But What Hurts Me The Most,
You Know I’m Not Well,
No Call And No Text,
Should Ring An Alarm Bell,
But It Didn’t,
Which Hurts,
Or It did which hurts more..
Just What Have I Done
To Be Sorry For..
After All We Went Through,
I Was There Every Day,
Looking After You,
I Never Ran,
Come Rain Or Shine,
I Hid My Tears,
Pretend All Was Fine,
But It Wasn’t,
It Eat Away At Me,
Tore Me Inside,
There Was No Where For Me,
To Run Or To Hide,
I Stood My Ground,
No Matter How Hard Things Got,
It Would Have Been Less Painful,
If I Had Been Shot,
In The Head,
Blowing Out My Brains,
Rip off my limbs,
Cut up my body and Tie
It in chains..
But I Did It,
And I Did It For You,
I Can Hold My Head High,
No Matter How Hard,
I Saw It All Through,
But What Hurts Me The Most,
You Know I’m Not Well,
No Call And No Text,
Should Ring An Alarm Bell,
But It Didn’t,
Which Hurts,
Or It did which hurts more..
Just What Have I Done
To Be Sorry For..
The Day Before The Day Before
Waking Up From The Night Before,
Blood Soaked Clothes,
Litter The Floor..
Now Trying To Remember,
Instead Of Trying To Forget..
My Visions A Blur,
Blood Shot Eyes,
Cuts Across My Chest,
My Arms And My Thighs..
A Pool Of Blood,
Disguised As My Bed,
From A Blade To My Wrists,
A Strike To The Head..
Feelings Start To Return,
Valium Cutting A Slight Edge,
Alcohol Dims The Constant Pain,
The Healing Of Flesh,
A Recovering Vein..
Hours Pass,
My Limbs Start To Creak,
Body Starts To Move,
My Mouth Starts To Speak..
The Cocktail Kicking In,
Feeling Half Human Again..
I Haven’t Got Long To Savour,
I’m Jekyll Now,
Dr Hyde’s Around Later..
Blood Soaked Clothes,
Litter The Floor..
Now Trying To Remember,
Instead Of Trying To Forget..
My Visions A Blur,
Blood Shot Eyes,
Cuts Across My Chest,
My Arms And My Thighs..
A Pool Of Blood,
Disguised As My Bed,
From A Blade To My Wrists,
A Strike To The Head..
Feelings Start To Return,
Valium Cutting A Slight Edge,
Alcohol Dims The Constant Pain,
The Healing Of Flesh,
A Recovering Vein..
Hours Pass,
My Limbs Start To Creak,
Body Starts To Move,
My Mouth Starts To Speak..
The Cocktail Kicking In,
Feeling Half Human Again..
I Haven’t Got Long To Savour,
I’m Jekyll Now,
Dr Hyde’s Around Later..
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)